The perfect woman- A housewife?

Nowadays, the work place is a very common spot for women. Many women strive to be more than just a housewife, and take advantage of their ability to receive an education and work, whether or not they decide to have children. Stay at home moms are harder to come by these days, since many women prefer to work. Working gives many people a sense of fulfillment- knowing that you accomplished something. Without any sense of accomplishment, life can become very dull and boring. Achieving an education and getting a job may seem like a great way to live, but according to Betty Freidan, this was not always the case.

In “The Feminine Mystique” by Betty Freidan, she analyzes the reasons why women were feeling a lack importance when they were just housewives, which she refers to as “the problem that has no name”. Women thought that by embracing their femininity, they would become the perfect woman and be happy. Unfortunately, the lack of achievement dawned on them, so they ended up very unhappy, without an understanding of why. As Freidan explains, “It is easy to see the concrete details that trap the suburban housewife, the continual demands on her time. But the chains that hind her in her trap are chains in her own mind and spirit. They are chains made up of mistaken ideas and misinterpreted facts, of incomplete truths and unreal choices” (31). So why didn’t women understand what these “incomplete truths and unreal choices” were? It all has to do with the things they were exposed to.

Advertisements shaped the ideology of many women in this era. They were supposed to conform to their husbands wishes, and essentially do everything with him in mind. The main ways they accomplished this was by cooking, cleaning, and taking care of the children for him. They were under this notion that they would be better wives if they did all of these things for him, as this advertisement shows. “For over fifteen years, the words written for women, and the words women used when they talked to each other. . . were about problems with their children, or how to keep their husbands happy, or improve their children’s school, or cook chicken or make slipcovers” (18-19). Women were only expected to do these tasks at home, so it is now surprise that they felt “nothing” at the end of the day.

These advertisements showed how women were supposed to dress, act, and feel. In the advertisement shown, this woman is standing next to an oven, wearing an apron, with food. The advertisement describes her as “a woman of high degree” because she makes her family feel special by waterless cooking. This ideology enforces the idea that women are supposed to serve their families, and make them “feel special”, so it is no wonder that women were not feeling special themselves.

Advertisements like these gave growing girls the idea that their only goal in life should be to become a housewife. Even though they had access to an education, many women stopped attending school, and if they went, it was to find a husband. “The proportion of women attending college in comparison with men dropped from 47 per cent in 1920 to 35 per cent in 1958. . . By the mid-fifties, 60 per cent dropped out of college to marry, or because they were afraid too much education would be a marriage bar” (16). Women would sacrifice their education since it they thought it would make them less tempting to marry. There was no point in getting an education, since it would not be necessary once they were married and living at home. Doing anything but becoming a housewife was truly frowned upon. “They were taught to pity the neurotic, unfeminine, unhappy women who wanted to be poets of physicists or presidents. They learned that truly feminine women do not want careers, higher education, political rights…” (15-16). Women who did obtain an education were frowned upon, since they were not embracing their femininity by living for their husband.

If a women did decide to work, it was to put their husband through school. The women that went to school “…were married women who held part-time jobs, selling or secretarial, to put their husbands through school, their sons through college, or to help pay the mortgage. Or they were widows supporting families. Fewer and fewer women were entering the professional world” (17). Women were expected to put everyone before them, since being a housewife was supposed to be rewarding in itself.

It is important to keep in mind the reasons why women thought this was a good way to live. Growing up under these stereotypes through the media, women thought they would feel satisfied with their lives once they were stay at home wives. Personally, I found if very hard to believe that this was the only thing women looked forward to, but it all has to do with the environment they were raised in.

Work Cited

Friedan, B. (1963). The Feminine Mystique. American Sociological Review, 28(6), 1053